You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
by Kamije Celeek
Summary: (Using songs by various artists) Corey finally realizes how he feels about Laney, but before he can tell her, she's swept off her feet by the lead singer of another group. When he finds out what his rival's really like, he's desperate to save Laney before she gets hurt. Musical! Now taking song suggestions! Rated T for adult themes and possible language.
1. Smoothie King

**Because there is not enough** _ **Grojband**_ **fanfiction on this site (seriously. I checked Wattpad and it has more of it), I've decided to add more contributions to the archive. But, because it's me, this is going to be a long author's note. Again.**

 **I guess the most logical place to start would be why I suddenly started writing** _ **Grojband**_ **again less than a year ago. The reasons behind that are simple; it became available on Netflix and I spent weeks binge-watching it over and over. Also, it's a good show. Yes, it's by the same animation company that made** _ **Total Drama**_ **, and yes, it's one of those summertime flash cartoons Cartoon Network released back in the early 2010s, but it was too cheesy for me not to like it. The characters were fun, the stories were interesting, and I loved a lot of the music. Not the rap, hip-hop, or country music episodes—those songs can go into Dante's** _ **Inferno**_ **'s nine circles of Hell.**

 **Now, onto the story itself.**

 **This story is actually one I've wanted to write for a while now. I listen to a lot of Green Day, Bowling for Soup, and various other bands, so naturally, loving a show about a rock band and listening to rock music would inspire some creativity. How long have I had this idea? Since June. Yes, I've been holding onto this idea since June of 2016. I don't know when this story's going up, but as of the initial start to the project (and I** _ **am**_ **going to finish this one), it's November 13, 2016. That means it's been almost six months since I had the initial spark of inspiration.**

 **Now, this story** _ **is**_ **supposed to be a musical, but I can't write songs, so I** _ **will**_ **be using lyrics from songs that are already copyrighted. I don't claim ownership, which is an issue I ran into with my** _ **previous**_ **songfic, "Sk8r Boi". This story will also be clichéd as all hell, which you can expect from me at times. Other times, I like to break the mold. This story may do both.**

 **The plot is simple and, like I said, a bit clichéd.**

 **It starts with Corey and his band doing typical stuff that you see them do on an everyday basis, such as planning their next concert. Then, Laney makes a couple of remarks that make Corey a little nervous—like, talking to your crush nervous. This first chapter—and yes, it** _ **is**_ **a multichapter fic—will consist of that and our first two songs. The first song will be about Corey realizing his feelings for Laney in Green Day's "She's a Rebel" and the second will introduce our antagonists/villains with a Bowling for Soup song, "Smoothie King". Trina will have a large role in the story, but not as our bad guy. The Newmans will appear, but not as villains, either. It's OCs all the way, baby!**

 **Enjoy this story I've been trying to write for six months!**

* * *

The day Corey's life changed both for better and for worse (no, he did not get married) started out like any other day. He was in his garage practicing with his best friends, and they sounded better than ever.

"Wow! Great rehearsal, guys!" he commented.

"You say that after _every_ rehearsal, Core," Laney laughed. For some reason, her laugh made his stomach twist into an uncomfortable knot.

"Yeah, but it's always true!"

"Hey, guys!" Blair greeted them, running into the garage followed by her sister, Misty. She had her tablet in hand, as usual.

"What's up, Blair?" Corey slid to a stop in front of their band manager.

"I just booked you at the annual Battle of the Bands. The normal one, not the one where you have to do something else at the same time."

"Awesome! We'll get started practicing."

"Actually, in case you forgot, Corey, today is the second Saturday of the month." She pulled down a calendar for emphasis and tapped the day's date. "And you know what _that_ means!"

"You get Laney for the afternoon for a girls' day," he sighed.

"Oh, that's right!" Laney slid off the stage and over to her girl best friend. "Sorry, Core, but Blair and I _do_ need some girl time."

"It's fine!"

"Yeah!" Blair agreed. "I was thinking spa facial for you, Laney. Ooh! You'll look so pretty!"

"Thanks, Blair." She waved to the boys. "See you guys tomorrow!"

Corey sighed as Blair and Laney left. Misty was sitting on the couch and looking at him.

"What's wrong, Corey?" she asked.

"I dunno… it's just been kinda weird hanging out with Lanes lately. I can't put my finger on it, but…"

"You like her!"

"Of course I like her! She's my best friend!"

"No, I mean you _like_ her. How does it feel?"

"Well, for starters, whenever she laughs, I get this feeling in my stomach, and my heart went a hundred miles per hour when she accidently touched my hand, and I can't stop looking at her, and—"

"Doctor Misty, do we have a diagnosis?" Kon asked the younger girl.

"We do, indeed. Our patient is in love!"

"What do you recommend?" Kin inquired, adding to the joke.

"I recommend 20 ccs of hardcore confession!"

"Pfft!" Corey scoffed. "No way am I in love with Laney! It's not like I lay awake at night, thinking about her. How pretty she is. How she makes me laugh. How her singing is one of the most beautiful sounds on the planet. How awesome she is on the bass…"

"Corey, you _are_ in love with her! And you can tell her that! She's not like most girls."

"Yeah. She's a rebel.

Background music began playing.

 _"She's a rebel_ ," he sang. _"She's a saint. She's the salt of the earth and she's dangerous."_

" _She's a rebel, vigilante,"_ added Kin and Kon. _"Missing link on the brink of destruction."_

 _"From Chicago, to Toronto, she's the one that they call 'ole Whatsername',"_ all four sang together.

" _She's a symbol of resistance, and she's holding onto my heart like a hand grenade!"_ Corey continued, running out of the garage with his friends right behind him. " _Is she dreamin' what I'm thinkin'? Is she the mother of all bombs gonna detonate?"_

 _"Is she trouble?"_ residents of Peaceville asked as Corey came by.

 _"Like I'm trouble, make it a double-twist of fate or a melody that she sings a revolution, the dawning of our lives! She brings this liberation that I just can't define! Well, nothing comes to mind!"_

People cheered Corey and the other three on as they had a dance break in the musical number. Then Misty, Kin, Kon, and the rest of the crowd echoed the first part.

 _"She sings a revolution, the dawning of our lives!_

 _"She brings this liberation that I just can't define! Well, nothing comes to mind! She's a rebel. She's a saint!"_

 _"She's the salt of the earth and she's dangerous!_

 _"She's a rebel, vigilante! Missing link on the brink of destruction!"_

 _"She's a rebel! She's a saint! She's the salt of the earth and she's dangerous!"_

 _"She's a rebel, vigilante! Missing link on the brink of destruction!"_

 _"She's a rebel! She's a rebel! She's a rebel!"_

 _"And she's dangerous!"_

 _"She's a rebel! She's a rebel! She's a rebel!"_

 _"And she's dangerous!"_

The musical number ended, and everyone except Misty, Corey, Kin, and Kon dispersed.

"So, you're in love with Laney?" Misty asked.

"Yes. I can say that now."

"So you're going to have your first kiss with her?"

"We sorta already did. By accident. On second New Year's."

"Why do you never tell us the important things?!" Kon yelled.

"Like I said, it was an _accident_! Besides, she doesn't like me back. She's too awesome."

"You're kidding me, right?"

He looked to see Trina walking towards him.

"She _totes_ loves you, Corey!" his older sister scoffed. "Denial is more than a river in Africa!"

"How do I know you're not lying?" he asked.

"Puh-leeze! _Everyone_ knew! She was _so_ obvious about it!"

"I'm _that_ dense?" He turned to Kin and Kon. "Did you two know she has a crush on me?"

"Uh… no!" Kin blurted.

"Yeah, it's not like she wrote about you in her diary, or her eyes turn into hearts whenever you touch her, or—" Misty elbowed the larger twin.

"So it's true. I'm an oblivious jerk."

"Corey," Misty sighed, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I don't know much about love. I've never had a crush on anyone, and I probably never will. But one thing I _do_ know about love is that it's unexplainable. You can _try_ to reason why you love somebody, but it's impossible to know for sure. You may be an oblivious jerk, but Laney loves you because she loves you, and vice versa. What's important is that you tell her how you feel. That's the surefire way to kickstart your relationship."

"You're right!" Corey patted the eleven-year-old's head. "Thanks, Misty. Now, where's the spa?"

"Oh. They're closed today. I forgot to tell Blair."

"So, where would they go on Girl's Day besides the spa?"

"The Peaceville Mall! They like to check out the music store and a couple other places before they go get lunch in the food court." The others stared. "What? I just don't go on days they go to the spa!"

"To the mall!" Corey yelled.

 _TO THE MALL TRANSITION!_

"So, any luck with Corey yet?" Blair asked Laney as she pulled a copy of _Duality_ by Set It Off out of a stack.

"No, not yet," Laney sighed. "He still treats me like one of the guys. I can't figure out how to make that hard head of his see me as a girl!"

"It's all a matter of timing! Romance is a lot like comedy: timing plus delivery equals success!"

"I don't think that applies in this situation. Maybe it's time to move on, you know? Start looking into other options. Like your twin?"

"Okay, first of all, if you think I'm gonna let you date Justin, then you're insane. Second of all, why give up on Corey? You two are _meant_ to be together!"

"He's _not_ interested! Why keep hope alive when it's not gonna happen?"

"'When the world says, "Give up.", hope whispers, "Try it one more time!"' Do you know who said that, Laney?"

"No…"

"Neither do I, but it's true."

"Let's just grab our lunch and then hit the theater."

In the food court, the stage that had been put up just a month earlier (Grojband had been first to perform on that stage) had instruments on it. Sound equipment, too.

"Was there supposed to be a performance today?" Laney asked her best friend.

"Not as far as I know. Grojband and The Newmans are the only bands in Peaceville who play venues like this."

Barney got onstage and said into the mike, "Hello, food court! We have a very special group with us today! Please put your hands together for Peaceville's newest group, Heart's Fire!"

Four supercute boys walked out onstage and picked up the instruments. Blair and Laney made their way through the crowd to the front row just as Corey and the others walked into the food court.

"Hello, Peaceville!" the lead said into the mike. He had shaggy brown hair and a mischievous grin. "We are Heart's Fire, and I'm Alexander! Today, we have a special performance for you!" His eyes scanned the crowd and landed on Laney. "I'd like to dedicate this song to the pretty red-haired girl up here in the front row."

Laney giggled nervously. Corey looked through the crowd for Laney as Heart's Fire began to play a smooth intro. Alexander grabbed the mike.

" _She don't even know exactly where she wants to go. Is that a double-negative? Oh, never mind let's go to the next line of the story. I met her at the Smoothie King, she said Seattle's best. She may be right; think I remember coffee on her breath. She smoked cigarettes… I chewed bubble gum. I know I shouldn't take it but I think I kinda like it when she tells me that I'm dumb. And this may sound pathetic but I think that we can make it. We'll go on and on and on and on!"_

 _"Love songs suck and fairy tales aren't true,"_ the rest of Heart's Fire sang with him.

" _And happy-ending-Hollywood is not for me and you! So add it up! Break it down! It's not that hard to figure out you're crazy and I'm crazy about you!_ "

When the song ended, the crowd went wild and Laney and Blair went to get their lunch. Corey was still looking for Laney.

"They were pretty good, huh?" Blair asked Laney as they sat at their favorite booth.

"Yeah!" Laney replied. "They'll probably do some stupid stunts, though. They're talented, but they're pretty boys."

"And _you're_ a pretty girl."

She turned to see Alexander and his group standing nearby.

"Uh, hi?" she greeted him tentatively.

"Hey." He gave her a smile. "My name's Alexander, but you knew that already. I'd like to know _your_ name."

"Laney."

"Pretty name."

"Are you just here to hit on me?"

"No. I came to ask you out."

Corey had just entered the restaurant (he'd seen Laney) when he heard Alexander say that.

"W-wow! I'm not used to people just _asking me out_!"

"You can't have known too many decent guys, then. I'm surprised. So, you in?"

"It depends. What would we be doing?"

"Just seeing a movie. I pay, you pick."

"Okay."

"Meet me at the theater at six."

"See ya then!"

Alexander left and Corey felt his heart shatter into a million pieces.

"Oh, Corey," Misty sighed. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine," he murmured. "She can go out with whoever she wants."

"You okay, buddy?" Kon asked.

"I'm fine, Kon. I'm just going home. Laney's out of my league."

And with that, he walked out of the mall.

* * *

 **And that concludes chapter one.**

 **This story will have a new feature: suggest a song! Here's how it works: I give you guys the story rundown for the next chapter, and you suggest songs!**

 **Here's next chapter synopsis:**

 **Laney goes on her date with Alexander while Corey's trapped in a spiral of self-pity. He rouses from it when he finds out what Alexander's really like and plans to save Laney.**

 **Leave your suggestions in the reviews!**

 **So long and thanks for all the fish!**


	2. Know Your Enemy

**I finally had a chance to work on chapter two of this story. Nobody seems interested in helping me, though, through song requests… *sighs***

 **This chapter will introduce The Newmans, and will also give us our first love song, "Love is an Open Door" from** _ **Frozen**_ **. Our other song will be another Green Day song, "Know Your Enemy", and it will be a group effort from Grojband and The Newmans.**

* * *

"I'm just not sure about this, Blair," Laney confessed. "I mean, Alexander's cute and all, but I liked Corey first."

"Well, just go out with him once, and we'll figure it out from there, okay?" Blair advised. "Besides, you have twenty minutes to be at the theater."

"Oh, thanks!"

"Call me to tell me how it went!"

LET'S CHECK ON COREY'S EMOTIONS!

"Corey?"

Kin rapped on their leader's door. He and Kon hadn't heard from him since lunch.

"Come on, dude! It's been hours!" Kon groaned. "We're coming in!"

They entered Corey's room to find him buried under his comforter. Shockingly, Trina was sitting next to her brother, a sad look on her face.

"Since when do you care this much about your brother?" Kin asked her.

"Like, since he got his heart broken! I know how it feels."

"You _do_ know that he still has a chance with Laney, right? All he has to do is get her to dump Alexander!"

"That's, like, _totally_ not going to happen. Alexander is the kind of guy girls don't ditch easily."

Corey sighed dramatically.

"Relax, little brother. Unless he's got a sense of humor and, like, a _great_ personality, Laney's not gonna stay with him long."

"You think so?" Corey came out from under his blanket.

"I _know_ so. Nick Mallory was great-looking, but I found someone better. Looks aren't everything."

"Thanks, I guess…?"

ONE WEEK LATER TRANSITION!

"So, wait, you have _how_ many brothers?" Laney asked Alexander as they sat outside the restaurant where they'd gotten dinner.

"Three older brothers and two younger ones. What about you?"

"I just have one actual sibling: a twin brother. His name's Lenny, and we're supposed to be archenemies because our bands are rivals."

"That's awful for you, but hey. That's what some bands do." Laney suddenly felt very giddy, and she let out a nervous laugh.

"Hey, can I say something crazy?"

"Oh, Laney, I _love_ crazy!"

" _All my life has been a series of doors in my face_ ," she sang, slamming the door to the restaurant shut. " _And then suddenly I bump into you…_ "

"I was thinking the same thing, 'cause like _I've been searchin' all my life to find my own place, and maybe it's the party talkin', or the chocolate fondue._ " He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, making her giggle.

" _But with you…"_

 _"But with you, I've found my place."_

 _"I see your face."_

 _"And it's nothing like I've ever felt before! Love is an open door! Love is an open door! Life can be so much more!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"Love is an open door."_ They were in the park now, dancing around the statue in the center before they sat down on a bench.

 _"I mean, it's crazy,_ " he remarked.

 _"What?"_

 _"We finish each other's—"_

 _"Sandwiches."_

 _"That's what I was gonna say!"_

 _"I've never met someone—"_

 _"Who thinks so much like me. Jinx! Jinx again! Our mental synchronization can have but one explanation."_

 _"You—"_

 _"And I—"_

 _"Were just meant to be!"_

 _"Say goodbye!"_

 _"Say goodbye to the pain of the past! We don't have to feel it anymore! Love is an open door! Love is an open door! Life can be so much more!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"With you!"_

 _"Love is an open door…"_

"Can I say something crazy?" Alexander asked.

"Sure."

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Can I say something even crazier? Yes!"

THIS CAN'T BE ALL THAT GOOD!

"Remind me why we're here again?" Carrie grumbled to Lenny.

"Because Grojband hasn't had a gig in over a week," Lenny reminded her. "What's the point of being rivals with them if we don't compete with each other?"

The Newmans entered the garage to find Corey curled into a ball of self-pity on the couch. Kin and Kon were sitting nearby for moral support.

"What's wrong with Riffin?" Carrie asked.

"Short version: he's depressed because he realized he had a crush on Laney on the day she got asked out by her new boyfriend," Kin explained.

"What's the long version?" Kim asked.

"About 2,570 words," Kon informed her.

"Get up!" Carrie shook Corey.

"I can't. Grojband's just not Grojband without Laney, and she's spending all her time—"

"With Alexander," Lenny finished.

"Yeah. Wait, how'd you know her boyfriend's name?"

"I'd like to know that, too!" Carrie snapped.

"Look, that's not—"

"Oh, it _is_ important, because it concerns Laney. Now, tell us!"

"Okay, okay. Laney and I have kept it a secret, since our bands are rivals and you guys hate each other, but… we're twins. Actual brother and sister." He braced himself for Carrie's rant, but it didn't come.

"That's a relief!" Corey sighed.

"I thought you were gonna say you two used to date or something!" Carrie agreed.

"Well, now that you guys know, you should _also_ know I'm not the biggest fan of her new boyfriend, either. He's _too_ charming."

"I wouldn't know. I've barely seen him," Corey groaned.

"Something's off about him. That's the other reason I came here besides our rivalry. I may be a Newman, and my sister may be a member of Grojband, but I still care about her. She needs to break up with Alexander—"

"Have you tried talking to her?" Konnie asked.

"I did, but she won't _listen_! He's inside her head and he has her 100% convinced they're meant to be together. She's going to get hurt if we don't do something about it!"

"So what are _we_ supposed to do?" Corey inquired.

"Look, I don't think she's in a place where she'll listen to anyone right now. Grojband always has a crazy plan that might just work. We need one to break Laney and Alexander up."

Corey tapped his chin, mulling it over. He then turned to Carrie and sighed.

"Carrie, I know we have our differences, but do you think we could put them aside?"

"Sure, Riffin. Truce?"

"Truce." They shook hands.

"Besides, we would've done it anyway. Girl code, you know. What's the plan?"

"Okay! Got it!" The two bands (plus Trina and Mina) got into a huddle. "Alexander's _too_ perfect, right? So what if we dug up something on him that proved he's _not_ that perfect?"

"I like the way you think, Corey!" Lenny complimented. "But how are we gonna get the evidence?"

"Easy! We're gonna follow him! It's not like we've never done stakeouts before!" He put his hand in, and everyone else followed suit. "Operation Make-Prettyboy-Alexander-Look-Bad-So-He-And-Laney-Break-Up-And-He-Doesn't-Break-Her-Heart-Into-A-Million-Tiny-Little-Pieces is now in—" he took a deep breath "—play!"

"How about Operation Breakup?" Trina suggested.

"That's better. Operation Breakup, on three! One, two, three—"

"OPERATION BREAKUP!" everyone except Kon and Konnie yelled. They said, "Operation Make-Prettyboy-Alexander—er, Breakup?"

WHO'S A WHAT'S A WHAT NOW?

"Any sign of him?" Corey asked Kin over the walkie-talkie.

"No, not yet," Kin replied. "I barely know what he looks like, but I know enough to know how to spot him."

"Let me know when you see him." Corey sank back down next to Lenny, who had his binoculars out. The red-haired boy put them down and glanced at his frenemy.

"What's wrong, Corey?"

"It's just… what if after our plan works, Laney breaks up with Alexander but doesn't want _me_? I've been a wreck this past week with her being with him. What if she rejects me?"

"Look, dude, Laney's been _crazy_ about you for years now. You can't just turn feelings off overnight. Trust me, I've tried. Let's just get our plan over with so you can tell her how you feel, okay?"

"Okay. You're—"

"Rock God to Front Man! Come in, Front Man!" Kin's frantic voice said over the walkie.

"Front Man! I hear you, Rock God!" Corey replied, holding up the walkie. "What's your status?"

"I see Alexander, and it's not good. Look through your binoculars!"

Corey took Lenny's binoculars and aimed them until he saw Alexander… making out with a blonde girl. Kin was right nearby, and he held up his walkie-talkie so Corey could hear their conversation.

"…perfect, Amanda," Alexander told the blonde girl.

"You sure know how to flatter a girl, don't you?" Amanda giggled. "What about that redhead, though? Grojband's bassist, Laney?"

"I swear, she's _nothing_ compared to you. I just want her for my band, that's all. She's too good for Grojband."

Kin moved away, and at the right time, too. Corey gripped the walkie so hard it broke into a thousand pieces.

IT WAS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!

"That _jackass_!" Corey spat, pacing back and forth in his garage. "'She's _nothing_ compared to you!? She's too good for Grojband?!' I'll show him!"

"Corey, calm down," Trina groaned. "You're being overdramatic."

"Yeah, dude," Kin agreed. "The inside of your head is angry again." As if to emphasize, he opened Corey's head to reveal an _extreme_ angry face.

"He's going _down_ ," Corey seethed. "I don't care what we have to do. That bastard's gonna pay!"

"Well, Riffin, I have one question for you," Carrie responded. " _Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy?_ " He shrugged. " _Well, gotta know the enemy._ "

" _Do you know the enemy?_ " the others sang in repeat. " _Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy…_ _Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy!_ "

" _Violence is an energy,_ " Corey added, a determined look on his face. " _Against the enemy. Well, violence is an energy, right?_ _Bringing on the fury, the choir infantry revolt against the honor to obey!_ "

" _Oohaooh!"_ the others vocalized.

" _Overthrow the effigy, the vast majority. We're burnin' down the foreman of control!"_

 _"Oohaooh!"_

 _"Silence is the enemy against your urgency so rally up the demons of your soul!"_

 _"Oohaooh!"_

 _"Do you know the enemy?"_ asked Trina. " _Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy!"_

 _"Do you know the enemy?"_ sang the backups. " _Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy!"_

" _Insurgency will rise when the blood's been sacrificed,"_ Corey sang. _"Don't be blinded by the lies in your eyes!"_

 _"Say!"_

 _"Well, violence is an energy."_

 _"Oohaooh!"_

 _"From here to eternity."_

 _"Oohaooh!"_

 _"Well, violence is an energy."_

 _"Oohaooh!"_

 _"Silence is the enemy! So give me, give me revolution!"_

 _"Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy! Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy! Do you know the enemy? Do you know your enemy? Well, gotta know the enemy!"_

 _"Overthrow the effigy. The vast majority, we're bringin' down the foreman of control! Silence is the enemy against your urgency so rally up the demons of your soul!"_

"So, how are we gonna deal with this?" Lenny asked.

"Like I said, we're bringing him down, but we'll need a little more help… I happen to know someone who needs to know this information…"

TO THE MANSION TRANSITION!

"Why are we here?" groaned Kon. "Last time we went to Blair's was a disaster, remember?"

"Yeah, but don't you think she'll be willing to help us break them up if we tell her that Alexander's cheating on her best friend?" Corey asked.

"He's right," Lenny confirmed. "Blair's a mama bear when it comes to her friends, especially Laney."

"Hey, guys!" Blair called, sliding down the bannister and nailing the landing. "What's up? Corey, nice to see you're out of your spiral of self-pity!"

"Blair, we need to talk to you," Corey began, but Blair held up a hand.

"Just a sec. Are you with… _The Newmans_?! And Trina and Mina?!"

"They know," Lenny informed her.

"Well, _something_ must've happened to make your groups stop hating each other. What was it?"

"Alexander," Corey growled.

"Oh, come _on_ , dude! If you wanted to be with Laney _that badly_ , you would've made your move earlier. She was _waiting_ for you, but you didn't do anything, so she moved on. I'd suggest you do the same."

"But Alexander's an asshole!" blurted Lenny. Blair looked shocked at hearing the soft-spoken boy swear.

"I… what do you mean? I met him after the show at the mall, and he was a perfect gentleman! He complimented Laney, dedicated their song to her, and he asked her out _immediately_. A _perfect gentleman_!"

"He's also a two-timing jackass who doesn't actually give a shit about Laney!" Corey yelled. Kim pulled out her phone and brought up the video of Alexander and Amanda.

"You need to see this," she said. "It explains everything."

Blair watched the video. Her expression changed from confusion to one Trina had before an angry diary moment. Kim took her phone back and Blair picked up the nearest breakable object to smash it on the floor.

"Blair, we're taking him down!" Corey assured her.

"How?! I'll help you get rid of that motherfucker any way I can!"

"We were hoping you might have a plan," Lenny sighed. "Laney tells you _everything_. You have to know _something_!"

"Well… Heart's Fire is playing at the Battle of the Bands, and so are Grojband and The Newmans." Her eyes lit up. "I've got it! Grojband and The Newmans combine into one band and have a musical duel against Heart's Fire! Winner gets to publicly shame the loser! When we win, we'll play the video and Laney will dump Alexander's two-timing ass!"

"Sounds great!" Corey complimented.

"So…" Blair put her hand in the middle of their group. "Operation Heartbreaker is a go!"

"OPERATION HEARTBREAKER!"

And so it truly begins.

* * *

 **So, that concludes chapter two. Sorry about the extra length. I wanted there to be plenty of setup for the next chapter, since I want to go straight into the action. I already have the songs picked out for it, so no requests will be taken. One song's band was referenced in the first chapter ("Wolf in Sheep's Clothing" by Set It Off) and the other one is the title of the fic ("You're Gonna Go Far, Kid" by The Offspring).**

 **This is the last thing I'm publishing for 2016, so keep an eye out for the next chapter next year! Consider this a Christmas present, since I'm publishing this on Christmas Eve!**

 **Merry Christmas and so long and thanks for all the fish!**


	3. Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

**Let's kick off the new year right with the third chapter of this story. If you bothered to read the author's note at the end of the last chapter, you will know what the songs are this time around. The only question is how I'm going to pull this off.**

 **It's simple, dear reader.**

 **I'm going to do whatever the hell I want and you can gripe with me in the comments.**

* * *

Alexander checked his watch as he arrived at the Riffin garage. He sighed.

"I wonder why they asked to meet me…" he muttered, running a hand through his already-messy hair.

Suddenly, the garage door closed and a single light was on him. Like an interrogation light.

"Hello, Alexander." The brown-haired boy turned to see Corey standing with his arms crossed.

"Er, sorry, who are you?" he asked.

"Corey Riffin. Guitarist and front man for Grojband."

"Oh, Laney's mentioned you, in passing. Why am I here?"

"Because we need to talk."

"About what?"

"Laney."

"Oh, I get it. You're jealous that she's _my_ girlfriend."

"No. It's a bit more complicated than that."

As if on cue, the rest of Operation Heartbreak's team came into view. Blair had her arms crossed, and so did Lenny. Everyone had an angry expression.

"What's going on?" Alexander inquired, feeling scared.

"We know about your plans for Laney," Blair growled.

"And we have a proposition," Lenny added.

"My plans for Laney?"

"To have her join _your_ band by lying to her about loving her!"

"But I _do_ love her!"

"No, you don't!" Corey yelled. "I _know_ you don't! You're seeing another girl behind her back! We saw you!"

"You're lying!"

"We have video proof! You're going to lose one way or another!"

"Fine. What's your game?"

"A Battle of the Bands, between Heart's Fire and Grojband. Winner take all, meaning we show the video to Laney afterwards."

"And if my band wins?"

"It _won't_ happen."

"Fine. I accept your challenge."

Alexander and Corey shook hands, then the rival left.

"So, what do we call our mashup band?" Lenny asked Corey. "And how do we keep Laney away from it?"

"Simple, Lenny. For your first question, our band is temporarily called The Grojmans. It sounds better than Newband. Secondly, we have groupies and a Misty for that."

THEY'VE GOT A MISTY FOR THAT!

On the day of the Battle of the Bands: The Grojmans VS Heart's Fire Edition, Kate, Allie, and Misty kept Laney busy by any means necessary. The bands, on the other hand, were in the park, ready to rock. To keep things fair and unbiased, they'd decided to do an audience vote. Onstage, Mayor Mellow picked up the mike.

"Welcome, everyone!" he said to the people who'd shown up. "Today, we have a very special matchup between two bands: The Grojmans and Heart's Fire!" The crowd cheered. "It's a grudge match, I hear! Here's how the contest works: each band will go up and play a song for y'all. Once both bands have played, you'll have half an hour to cast your vote for the winner. Winner take all, here, folks!"

"Are we good?" Corey said into his new walkie-talkie.

"We're good," Kin replied. "I've got the light show rigged up. Are you guys ready to rock?"

"Yep! Let's hope this works…"

"Now, for our first act: they may have just arrived in town less than a month ago, but they've captured our hearts _and_ our ears—ladies and gentleman, Heart's Fire!"

"Hello, Peaceville!" Alexander said into the mike. "We're happy to play for you today, despite the fact that The Grojmans are a bunch of petty idiots." Corey tried to walk out onstage, but Trina held him back. "Our song is called 'Wolf in Sheep's Clothing' and we hope you enjoy it!"

They started playing their music, and the audience seemed to like it.

" _Ha, ha, ha!"_ Alexander cackled, pointing to Corey. " _This is about you! Beware, beware, be skeptical of their smiles, their smiles of painted gold. Deceit, so natural, but a wolf in sheep's clothing is more than a warning! Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any soul? No, sir, by the way, what the hell are morals? Jack be nimble, Jack be quick! Jill's a little whore and her alibis are dirty tricks. So, could you…?"_

 _"Tell me, how you're sleepin' easy, how you're only thinkin' of yourself!_ " the band sang with him. " _Tell me how you justify telling all your lies like second nature!"_

 _"Listen, mark my words, one day!"_

 _"One day!"_

 _"You will pay! You will pay! Karma's gonna come collect your debt! Aware, aware you stalk your prey with criminal mentality! You sink your teeth into the people you depend on. Infecting everyone, you're quite the problem! Fee-fi-fo-fum, better run and hide! I smell the blood of a petty little coward! Jack be lethal, Jack be slick! Jill will leave you lonely, dying in a filthy ditch! So, could you…?"_

 _"Tell me, how you're sleepin' easy, how you're only thinkin' of yourself! Tell me, how you justify telling all your lies like second nature!"_

 _"Listen, mark my words, one day!"_

 _"One day!"_

 _"You will pay! You will pay! Karma's gonna come collect your debt! Maybe you'll change. Abandon all your wicked ways, make amends and start anew again. Maybe you'll see all the wrongs you did to me and start all over, start all over. HA! Who am I kidding? Now let's not get overzealous here. You've always been a huge piece of shit! If I could kill you, I would, but it's frowned upon in all fifty states. Having said that, burn in Hell! Yeah! Oh! Oh! So…"_

 _"Tell me how you're sleepin' easy, how you're only thinkin' of yourself! Show me how you justify telling all your lies like second nature!"_

 _"Listen, mark my words, one day!"_

 _"One day!"_

 _"You will pay, you will pay! Karma's gonna come collect your debt! Karma's gonna come collect your debt! Oh, oh, oh! Karma's gonna come collect your debt!_ "

The song finished and the crowd went wild. Corey suddenly felt much less confident in their plan…

LET'S CHECK ON LANEY TRANSITION!

"So, what do you wanna do now?" Misty asked. Laney's phone suddenly bleated.

"'Great performance from Heart's Fire at Peaceville Park'," she read aloud. "'Can't wait to see how The Grojmans are going to top it!'?" She held out her phone to Misty. "I'm going to the park. Something's going on down there."

Almost too quickly, she ran towards the park and it took a second for Misty and the groupies to realize what had happened. They took off after her.

IT'S THE GROJMANS TURN!

"Hey, Peaceville!" Corey yelled into the mike. "I know our band's a little different than you're used to, but we still rock as hard as we always do!"

Laney skidded to a stop at the gate and saw Corey onstage with Kin, Kon, and… The Newmans?!

" _Show me how to lie; you're getting better all the time and turning all against the one is an art that's hard to teach_ ," Corey sang to a metal beat. " _Another clever word sets off an unsuspecting herd and as you step back into line, a mob jumps to their feet! Now dance, fucker, dance! Man, he never had a chance! And no one even knew it was really only you and now you steal away… take him out today… nice work ya did… you're gonna go far, kid!_ "

" _With a thousand lies and a good disguise, hit 'em right between the eyes!_ " the others sang with him. " _Hit 'em right between the eyes! When you walk away nothin' more to say! See the lightning in your eyes, see 'em runnin' for their lives!"_

 _"Slowly out of line and drifting closer in your sights so play it out, I'm wide-awake! It's a scene about me! There's something in your way and now someone is gonna pay and if you can't get what you want, well, it's all because of me! Now, dance, fucker dance! Man, I never had a chance! And no one even knew it was really only you and now you steal away… show the light of day… nice work ya did… you're gonna go far, kid!"_

 _"TRUST DECEIVED! With a thousand lives and a good disguise, hit 'em right between the eyes! Hit 'em right between the eyes! When you walk away, nothin' more to say! See the lightning in your eyes, see 'em runnin' for their lives!_ "

As Carrie rocked out a guitar solo and Kon and Konnie played their hearts out, Laney fought her way through the crowd. Misty and the groupies tried in vain to find the tiny redhead, but that proved impossible until she was almost to the stage door, which she quickly entered.

" _Now, dance, fucker, dance! He never had a chance! And no one even knew it was really only you so dance, fucker, dance! I never had a chance! It was really only you!"_

 _"With a thousand lies and a good disguise, hit 'em right between the eyes! Hit 'em right between the eyes! When you walk away nothin' more to say! See the lightning in your eyes, see 'em runnin' for their lives!"_

 _"Clever alibis, lord of the flies!"_

 _"Hit 'em right between the eyes! Hit 'em right between the eyes! When you walk away nothin' more to say! See the lightning in your eyes, see 'em runnin' for their lives!"_

Just like with Heart's Fire, the crowd went wild. Mayor Mellow got back on the mike.

"Now, remember! Y'all have thirty minutes to cast your votes! Let's see which band is the best!"

Alexander and the rest of Heart's Fire were waiting for the band.

"You trying to show us up?!" Alexander growled, getting in Corey's face.

"I'm trying to _win_ , so Laney doesn't get hurt," Corey snapped in response. Their respective groups pulled them apart and headed for the backstage area, where Laney was leaning against a vanity, tapping her foot with an angry expression.

"Welp, good luck, guys!" Kon said. The others took off, leaving Blair, Lenny, Corey, and Alexander alone with the redhead.

"Laney," Alexander greeted her, immediately putting an arm around her shoulders. She pushed him away.

"WHAT THE HELL, YOU GUYS?!" she exploded. "First of all… Alexander, why were you playing against _my_ band?! Second of all, Corey and Lenny, why were Grojband and The Newmans playing together?! Third of all, Blair, why were _you_ onstage instead of me?!"

"Laney, listen," Blair sighed. "It's… complicated."

"Actually, I can answer her question for me," Alexander said smoothly. "Your old friend, Corey, challenged Heart's Fire and accused me of cheating on you. To my face." Laney's jaw dropped and she wheeled around to face Corey.

"Wait, Lanes, I can explain!" Corey yelped, holding up his hands before she could punch him.

"You have about ten seconds!"

"Yes, we challenged Heart's Fire, but only for _you_! Alexander doesn't _actually_ care about you; he just wants you to play bass in his band!"

"WHAT?!"

"He's lying!" Alexander scoffed. "C'mon, babe! You believe me, right?!"

"Don't listen to him, Lanes!"

Laney felt conflicted. She looked from Corey to Alexander, trying to figure out who to believe.

"Oh, God…"

"Give us a bit! We have proof!" Corey assured her.

"What kind of proof?"

"Video proof, Lanes."

VIDEO PROOF TRANSITION!

"All right!" Mayor Mellow called into the mike. "I have the results of our voting right here!" He held up an envelope. "And, according to you, the citizens of Peaceville, the winner of this here Battle of the Bands is… The Grojmans!"

Corey whooped and ran out onstage with his group. Laney stood next to Alexander, who grabbed her hand tightly. She gave him a worried look.

"Alexander, is something wrong?" she asked.

"I'm not giving you up, Laney. Especially not to Corey."

"What are you talking about?"

"I've seen the way he looks at you! You're mine! Don't forget that."

All manner of red flags were going off in Laney's head. She needed to get away from him. She tried to pull away, but he dragged her out of the area and tried to leave the park. However, he forgot about the second-youngest Lovelace.

"Where do you think _you're_ going?" she snarled.

"Laney and I just need to talk."

"Uh-huh. That's why she's struggling to get away from you."

"Get out of my way!"

"Fine, but first…" She pulled a blue ocarina with three triangles near the mouthpiece out of her bag and played an unusual melody that seemed to repeat itself.

"That's Misty's warning!" Blair told Corey. "Alexander's trying to get out of here!"

"Let's get him!"

The group ran over, surrounding Alexander. Misty smirked and put the ocarina back in her bag.

"You _really_ wanna fuck with me, Riffin?!" Alexander yelled.

"Alex, let me go!" Laney demanded.

"Not now, babe. The men are talking."

"Oh, you're a man?" Misty asked innocently.

"I _said_ LET ME GO!" Laney managed to bring her foot upwards—right between Alexander's legs. He howled in pain and released her arm. She ran to Corey.

"You… little… _bitch_!" Alexander wheezed.

"There's plenty more where that came from! We're done, Alexander!"

"No… we're… not!"

"Yes, we are!"

"Let me take care of this trash," Misty offered, pulling the ocarina back out. She played another tune, this one more light and bouncy. Kate and Allie came over. "C'mon, girls. Let's show this guy what we do with garbage around here."

The three girls picked Alexander up after they'd tied him up and carried him away. Corey sighed in relief. Laney, on the other hand, didn't look as happy.

"Lanes?" he asked. Appropriately, the others left him alone with his crush. "What's wrong?"

"I just can't believe my first boyfriend turned out to be such an asshole. How come I didn't see through it?"

"I dunno. Maybe… maybe you just wanted to move on from something."

"I'm such an idiot. I deserve to be alone."

"You're not an idiot, Lanes."

"Corey, look at me. I'm _not_ exactly what you'd call girlfriend material. I don't have _anything_ going for me other than that I play bass. Maybe that's why I went with Alexander, because he made me feel like I was something that I'm just not: beautiful. I'm not smart, or all that talented, and like I said, I'm _not_ beau—"

She was cut off as Corey kissed her. She felt the same sparks she'd felt at their second New Year's gig when they'd kissed accidentally. He pulled away and she stared at him in confusion.

"Core…?"

"Shut up. Stop putting yourself down like that. You are the smartest, kindest, sassiest, funniest, most talented, and most beautiful person I know. You _are_ girlfriend material."

"How do you know?"

"Because I want you to be _my_ girlfriend."

Her eyes widened. All her feelings for Corey she'd tried to push down shot to the surface and she practically tackled him in a hug.

"I'll take that as a yes!" he laughed. The two kissed again, not noticing their friends and fans around them.

The two lovebirds were finally together.

* * *

 **I have one more chapter planned for this story: an epilogue. It will feature the final song, "Something That I Want" by Grace Potter and will be our big conclusion.**

 **In case you're interested, I have a YouTube channel, so if you want to hear my actual, grating, ultra-annoying voice, look up "Piper Pines" and watch my videos!**

 **So… until then…**

 **See you next time, and so long and thanks for all the fish!**


	4. Bridal Chorus

**Hey everybody!**

 **I'm back with the final chapter of this story!**

 **So, something happened in between me uploading chapter three and this chapter. I recently began being a beta reader for WanderlustandFreedom and a fanfiction they're writing. I hope you'll give that a look when it goes up.**

 **I decided against doing the final song, purely because I don't have the patience to type it all out.**

 **Anyway, presenting the final chapter!**

* * *

 _Knock, knock_.

"That must be Blair to run over the checklist," Kin told Corey, who was staring at the floor as he sat in a chair. "Try to snap out of it, dude."

"Hey, Kin," Blair greeted him as he opened the door. "I have the checklist."

"Okay, let's go over it."

"Rings?"

"Check."

"Flower arrangements?"

"Check."

"Corey having such cold feet he should have frostbite?"

"Oh, _super_ check."

"I can't help it!" Corey protested. "I just… I'm _getting married_ today!"

"And you're marrying _our best friend_ ," Blair shot back. "There's no way you're backing out now."

"What if _she_ backs out?!"

"Um, Corey, honey, she's _not_ going to back out. She's been in love with you since we were twelve. We're twenty-two. That's _ten years_. She's not going to _suddenly_ back out of something she's been fantasizing about for that long!"

"Besides, if it weren't for _you_ , Laney would've left the band and probably ended up in Heart's Fire," Kon added.

"And she would've been _miserable_ ," added Lenny.

"Thanks, guys," Corey sighed. "But, I'm just super-nervous! What if I mess up my vows or put the ring on the wrong finger or step on her dress or—"

"Inspirational hum?" Lenny asked.

"Inspirational hum," Blair agreed. Blair, Justin, and the twins started humming as Lenny prepared to give a typical 'this-is-crazy-but-I- _know_ -we-can-do-it!' speech.

"Listen, Corey. You love Laney, right?"

"Yeah…"

"So, if you _really_ love her, then you _have_ to go through with this. You've been friends with her for _seventeen years_ and dating her for six. You know better than _anyone_ how she'll take it, and how happy she'll be. It doesn't matter if you mess up. She doesn't _care_ because weddings _never_ go as planned. Something's going to go wrong, but at the end of the day, if you two just say 'I do', you'll still be in love and married."

"W-wow… I've never been on the receiving end of one of those speeches before…"

"So, can you do this, or do I have to knock some sense into you?" Blair inquired.

"I… yeah! I can do this!"

* * *

"I can't do this!"

Lenny smacked Corey's shoulder.

"You are _not_ backing out. Blair will _murder_ you."

Mina, Trina and Brian's five-year-old daughter, skipped down the aisle, spilling flower petals from her basket as she went. Corey fidgeted as Carrie, Kim, Konnie, and Blair made their way towards them, dressed in matching gowns in their respective signature colors. It was then that Laney appeared with her and Lenny's blonde-haired father (they'd obviously gotten their bright red hair from their mother), looking beautiful in her gown. Corey felt unable to breathe, just looking at her as she walked towards him. He caught a slight movement out of the corner of his eye; it was Blair, mouthing the words, 'BREATHE, GODDAMMIT!'

"Take care of her," Jeffrey Penn told his soon-to-be son-in-law as he made a show of performing the tradition of putting the bride's hand into the groom's.

"I will, sir."

The officiator, who was a recently-ordained Nick Mallory (don't ask), began reciting the standard wedding stuff until it was time for Corey and Laney to give their respective vows. Corey cleared his throat as Laney smiled at him.

"Laney, you entered my life when we were only five years old. I remember you wearing your hair in adorable little pigtails and Blair pushing me into the mud when I tried to play with you. I still wanted to be near you, and for eleven years, we were just best friends. That was before I got a wake-up call that what I thought was _just friendship_ was actually me being in love with you. You were my first for _everything_ : first kiss, first crush, first—and last—girlfriend, and first person I… well, let's not bring that up. For six years, you haven't just been my best friend—you've been the love of my life, and I swear I will stand by you through thick and thin, through good times and bad times, through creative slumps and creative highs. I love you, Laney."

Misty, from her spot in the pews, silently gagged as her sister smiled. It was Laney's turn.

"Corey, I fell in love with you ten years ago, when we first started junior high. I think we all remember what a rough time that was for me, and you were right by my side through it all. Despite my increased temper and constant threats of bodily harm to you, Kin, and Kon, you stuck by me and were the one who asked if I was okay. I was at that stage where I wasn't feeling particularly pretty, especially since most people didn't seem to recognize I was a girl. The fact that I only hung out with boys didn't help, either, but around you… it didn't matter. I felt pretty, and that was what mattered. I went along with every crazy plan you came up with, just to ensure you were happy. And… you saved me from being with somebody who didn't actually want or love me the way you did. I promise that I will love you forever, even when you're being an ignorant knucklehead or you're just having a bad day, or whether you're creatively on fire or bankrupt. I love you, Corey."

With that, they exchanged rings and their first kiss as Mr. and Mrs. Riffin. Blair started crying tears of joy, while Misty quietly slipped out to go to the reception.

* * *

At the reception, all the wedding guests (which included a large portion of Peaceville's population) were eagerly awaiting the arrival of the bride and groom. Blair was setting up her DJ booth for the dancing when she was approached by an unwelcome familiar face. She glared.

Alexander.

"Hello, Blair," he said in his British accent.

"Hello, bastard," she sighed.

"I just wanted to wish the happy couple congratulations."

"How did you even find out about this?"

"Word travels fast. Also, your twin has a massive social-media presence."

"I'm going to kill him…"

"You're looking lo—"

"Get away from me before I hurt you."

"Tell Serafina I said hello."

"Her name is _Misty_."

"She'll always be Serafina to me. After all, wasn't _she_ the one who got me caught?"

"Fuck you."

Alexander left Blair alone and went to wander the reception as Corey and Laney arrived. Corey made a move to punch the man, but Laney grabbed his arm.

"Let's _not_ mark our wedding with one of us getting in a fight."

"Didn't you tell me your dad punched out your _mom's_ ex for showing up at their wedding?"

"That was different. The ex grabbed at my mom."

The reception banquet began, with Corey and Laney sitting at a table with their parents and wedding party. Everyone was talking and laughing as they ate. Blair was the first one to stand up and take the mike.

"Hey, everybody!" she said brightly. Everyone quieted down and looked at her. "Um… I'm Blair Lovelace, and I'm Laney's maid-of-honor and best friend."

"WHOO!" yelled Justin, who'd already had quite a bit of wine. Blair laughed nervously.

"Laney has been my best friend since we were born. We shared everything except parents and genetics until we were five years old and started kindergarten. I'm going to be completely honest here and say that when I first met Corey, I hated his guts. He always wanted to play with Laney, and the thing about me pushing him into the mud was true. I did that on more than one occasion, making me question why I was so protective. I actually left Peaceville when we started third grade and didn't come back until we started ninth, so I wasn't there when Laney was going through her rough patch. It was my first failure as her best friend, but it was what made me determined to make up for it."

She locked eyes with Alexander.

"My next failure was convincing her to give up on Corey when we were sixteen. She started going out with someone who wanted to use her musical talent and didn't actually love her. However, Corey had just come to terms with his feelings for Laney, and he was willing to fight for her. I helped him get her back, and they've been together ever since. I think it's because of _my_ failures as Laney's best friend that she was able to get closer to Corey and develop her crush on him. Laney, this failure is proud to be a part of your life _and_ your wedding, and I hope you and Corey will have long and happy lives together…"

Once the speeches were done and the cake was cut, Corey and Laney began slow-dancing. It was a quiet moment—one they hadn't been able to have all night.

"I'm so happy, Lanes," Corey whispered.

"Me, too, Core. And… I have something I need to tell you."

"What is it?"

"We're having a baby."

Corey's eyes widened and his jaw dropped, but he stuck close to Laney, not wanting to alarm anybody.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I just got the results this morning."

"This is the greatest day of my life."

It was then that the music changed to the Caspar Slide, at the request of Kin and Kon. Corey and Laney joined in, laughing. Once all the dancing was out of the way, Laney prepared to throw the bouquet. All the single gals vied for it, but it flew over them… and landed in the hands of Laney's twin. He looked at Carrie, who was staring at him in shock, and shoved the bouquet into her hands.

"Here!" he squeaked, trying to run. Blair grabbed the back of his tux.

It was certainly a wedding to remember…

* * *

 **IT'S DONE**

 **I FINALLY FINISHED A** _ **GROJBAND**_ **FIC THAT WASN'T A ONE-SHOT.**

 **PRAISE THE LORD**

 **A couple notes about this chapter:**

 **Misty's real name is Serafina. She hates her parents, so she goes by Misty.**

 **Blair, Justin, and Misty all attended boarding school in Britain with Alexander; however, only Justin had classes with him, so the girls did not recognize him.**

 **Yes, Trina had a daughter with Brian. Surprise!**

 **Although I know it's cliche to make the girl pregnant at her wedding, it's not one I've done before, so NYAHH!**

 **So long and thanks for all the fish!**


End file.
